Haunted
by crackship-writer
Summary: When Eli said that he would be the only one haunted, he was wrong. In fact, almost everyone at Degrassi is haunted by Cam's death, and they most likely will be for awhile. A brief look into each of their minds shows exactly how troubled they are by the death.


Notes: Here's a little fanfic I thought of which follows, in the most basic way, how some of the students were affected by Cam's death. It's based around Jake's idea of the garden being haunted by the death, which may actually be a little true. I tried to include most of the significant characters, which explains why some are missing. Enjoy.

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"Is my garden going to be haunted now?" "Nah, just me…"

It's almost funny how wrong Eli was. After the death of Cam, it turned out that the garden did become haunted. No, there were no ghosts and gremlins roaming about, terrorizing any students who walked within five feet of the structure, but that is not the only way for a structure to be haunted.

Some of the students of Degrassi would have wished to have these demons occupy the dwelling instead of the ones that seemed to occupy their own minds, tormenting them with a simple glance at the greenhouse. No number of brightly colored floral planted by the loyal gardener changed the dark and doom in the eyes of the students. Despite Jake's efforts to make it a happy place again, all anyone could see when passing by were the flashing lights and frantic work of the police and EMTs as they removed Cam's lifeless corpse.

Even after months had passed by the memories were there and they affected the whole student body. Hardly anyone would eat lunch in there, not even when there were no tables left in the cafeteria. Sitting anywhere, even under the hot sun where the flies ate everything, was better than sitting in the garden.

Simpson knew this. Many students approached him petitioning for it to be taken down completely, but Jake, the only one brave enough to take care of what was once his sanctuary, begged him not to, at least not just yet. He had put so much work into it, twice, that he couldn't bear watch it be destroyed. Not while he was at Degrassi. Though it wasn't the one student's mind that swayed him, Simpson agreed to let it stay until he could figure out something to do with it.

And so the haunting continued, affecting each student in a very different way than the others. Eli, who was under the intense care of his therapist once again, couldn't even bare to go near that side of the building. If he had class in a room that was even facing it, he would insist that the shades be pulled down and he sit on the total opposite side of the classroom, as far away from the dark memories and images. Sometimes when he was really feeling down about Cam and Julia's deaths and he entered the room before the shades were pulled, he imagined their ghosts floating outside the window, mocking him with their appearances and the way they spoke to him. He couldn't hear their words, but their cruel laughter filled his mind until he finally couldn't stand it and left the room, rushing to the hall to catch a breath and get control of his mind again.

His girlfriend Clare, the other finder of the body, was not as troubled by the sight as Eli was, especially since he had blocked it from her view, for the most part. But seeing him so torn over it all did affect her greatly. Sometime he would be silent, sitting with her at lunch and just staring at wall, but other times he would actually talk, letting him into the deepest, darkest corner of his mind. As much as it scared her, and there was no doubt that it did, she listened for his sake, wishing there was some way she could help her boyfriend. She couldn't begin to imagine what was going through his mind, no matter how much he told her about it; she just knew that it hurt him more than it should have. Whenever she passed the greenhouse she couldn't help but glare at it, blaming it for the hurt it brought, even though it had once been her step-brother's pride and joy.

This wouldn't be the first time that the hockey team debated trashing the whole place. The first time was a total act of revenge; anger pushed them to upturn crops, eat the grown vegetables and make their mark to show that they were an unstoppable force. Now their driving factor was sadness for the loss of their dear teammate. They probably would have done it too, but their leader, Dallas, would not allow it. Despite how heartbroken he was by the memories, he knew better than to tear it down. He needed the memories to change him. Looking through the glass he saw the times when he could have helped Cam but failed. He envisioned the countless times Cam tried to talk to him, only to be pushed harder and harder until he finally reached his breaking point. Through the months that had passed, Mike learned that he was not at fault for what had happened. But he still felt somewhat responsible and each glance helped him move closer to changing his way and becoming a better, more understanding, team player. Now whenever a teammate approached him with a problem he listened, trying to be as patient and kind as he could.

Without anyone around to tutor, Alli finally had more time for her studies and date nights, but it was all too bittersweet. She would much rather be sitting among the petunias, going over the elements and their characteristics, than have all this free time to spend on preparing for her future. Whenever she heard the other grade 10s talking about a Chemistry exam she sighed, imagining the boy coming up to her afterwards, a large, goofy grin on his face because he had managed to pass the exam with her help. Often times when she had free time, she would sit near the greenhouse, reading a book on her studies or watching the students who passed by. As she sat, she wondered how many of these students were going through something themselves and if she could help them in ways she hadn't been able to help Cam. No one came up to her, but her presence let the younger students know that there were ears willing to listen.

In honor of his hockey teammate, Luke asked his father to have a prayer service every so often for the family and friends of Cam. It was also by his request that a plaque be made and christened, placed far away from the greenhouse, where it was specifically not placed so that people would actually see it. Becky wasn't as keen on these plans as Luke hoped she would be, but she eventually eased up. After all, as she would say, a life was taken and is now in the Father's hands. There was no use thinking ill things, especially when they only weakened the soul. So she prayed for him every night before falling asleep, for his own sake and other kids just like him. She would never understand why it was done and her views would never change, but it had happened and all she could do was pray.

Seeing that the students were still rattled by the death, even when it had taken place a while ago, Fiona made it a point to boost the morale, or at least to try to. Continuing Spirit Week was her first effort. It was clear as the week went on that there was still a bit of spirit missing, but it did its job and created a distraction for those students who needed it. Every few weeks or so, Fiona tried to host one event or another, creating a safe-space for students to just have fun and remember that they needed time to rid themselves of the stress the week brought. Between a pie eating contest, basketball tournament and plans for another carnival, the laughter at Degrassi was slowly returning. Cam was not forgotten, but everyone was coping. Fiona's own coping mechanism was bringing this happiness to everyone, bringing them off of the roof she used to often find herself on.

Like Dallas, there was another student who learned a lesson from the whole thing. Together, they were the ones to push Cam over the edge, though Zig was the one who felt fully responsible. He was the last one to talk to Cam, the last one to say such harsh words. He could never forgive himself for that, no matter how much people and counselors alike told him that this was not his problem. The pain caused him to turn into himself for a bit and ponder if he was the psycho out of the two after all. It took Zig a long time to get over these thoughts. Lots of coaxing, and realizing that he was acting just like Cam did, made him turn out and find someone to talk to when he needed it. The whole thing also made Zig realize that he needs to watch what he says and does to people in case he gives off the wrong vibe and send them over the edge as well, even when the edge isn't as drastic as Cam took it. He quickly became more sensitive, making sure to compliment someone when it was due, even when it was not. Though he was never much of a fan of Cam, he thanked him for his help in growing up and opening his eyes.

The two emotional niners cried over Cam often. It lessened as the days went on, but at any quick reminder of the boy, a few tears formed in their eyes. Sitting in French class was often the culprit since his seat was still left empty. When Tori's eye would catch it, she immediately turned to Tristan for a comfort. When Tristan would go to his locker and look across the hall, seeing Cam not at his, his hand instantly reached for Tori's. Cam had slowly been on his way to turning into one of them, growing accustomed to their silly ways, and that meant a lot to Tori and Tristan. He was their Cheesy, the shy boy whose shell was slowly cracking so that he could emerge and accept himself. But it never happened and the memory of the boy who bashfully walked through the halls always filled their memories, only slightly marred by the death he brought about. They wouldn't allow themselves to think of him in such a negative light, fighting their minds to keep the good thoughts in. It proved a challenge sometimes, especially when they wanted to be mad at him for the pain he left them with, but they did their best.

And then there's the girl who wouldn't allow herself to be hurt by it. Maya refused to cry. She refused to feel any sort of sadness about the situation. That was easier said than done, but for the most part, as far as anyone else could see, she had done a good job. She was the only person, besides Jake, brave enough to sit in the greenhouse. And she did it often, averting her eyes from where she imagined the body had been, only to sit on a bench that she and her old boyfriend had often sat. As she sat she remembered all the memories they had, the good and the bad. Smiling slightly to herself, she recalled the time they had lunch together and she tried to kiss him, ending up with her teeth on his ear instead. There were countless other times they had lunch out there, often trading sandwiches and snacks while giggling like the little school children they were.

Sometimes the boy in plaid would find Maya in there while he was working and he would silently sit beside her on his break, sighing to himself, not sure what to say, or if he should say anything at all. "It just sucks when it's your first boyfriend. Or maybe not…. At least a break up won't hurt as much as this does," Maya admitted to him, not moving her eyes from the planter of daisies next to her. "Losing someone you love is losing someone you love, no matter how permanent it is. It's always going to hurt no matter how long the break is," he muttered, glancing at her with a painful smile before rising again and getting back up to work. Maya realized then that she and Jake had something in common. She also saw, through him, that it was ok to hurt. It didn't mean crying publicly or letting everyone know. It didn't mean keeping it in like Cam did either. But maybe a healthy balance would do her some good. Just because she refused to cry didn't mean that she shouldn't. And eventually she did just that, letting out the tears brought on by the haunted memories of a haunted boy.


End file.
